That's Life.

If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got.
(Howard Hoffman...On Life.)

Prayer For The Stressed.

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept...and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I have to kill because they get on my nerves.

Help me always to give 100% at work:

12% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 20% on Thursday, and 5% on Friday.

Help me to remember, when I am having a bad day, and it seems like people are trying to wind me up, that it takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile, and only 4 to extend my arm and smack someone in the mouth.

Words of Wisdom

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually who are you not to be?You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people wont feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Nelson Mandela.

This is a photograph taken on a mobile phone, when we played at the World Mental Health Day at Longton Town Hall. The picture was taken by Natalie, from the Media Action Group. In the photo I'm playing an instrumental which I composed, titled"A Bird of Prayer." Before this I did some improvisation, with a new recruit to the Jam Factory, Simeon, who played the Roland synthesizer.

To see the video, which was also done on Natalie's mobile, Click on The Jam Factory blog.

"To dream of the person you would like to be, is to waste the person you are." (Anonymous.)

Two out of Three's Not Bad

In a previous post, I wrote about feeling unable to do certain things due to a lack of confidence. So as an update, here's how I went on: I went to the restaurant, and instead of having a meal, I just had a drink. Hopefully in future it will get easier and easier, so that eventually I'll be ordering a meal with the rest of my friends. I played my guitar at the World Mental Health Awareness Day. I played an improvisation with a new recruit (which can be seen on The Jam Factory blog, the video was made by Natalie, on her nifty mobile phone! and along with Pete Junior, I played "A Bird of Prayer," which is my own composition. I played these sitting on the steps of the stage, so hopefully the more I get back into playing live music, I'll eventually be able to stand on stage playing. Enrolling at college was the one I couldn't get myself to do, but I'm considering doing an online course, doing computer graphics instead. I managed to do these things, because of all the encouragement I received from friends at the Jam Factory and from the Media Action Group, (and Kate from the American.) Thanks for all the help I received, especially Natalie, who also made a lasting memory of the day for me by videoing me and taking photos.

POEM - About Risk

It's a risk to attempt new beginnings
But hasn't life always been a risk?
To cry is to risk appearing foolish.
To reach out is to risk entanglement.
To go forward is to risk failure.
Yet the greatest risk, is for you to risk nothing.
For then there would be no further possibilities of
Learning and changing, or travelling upon the journey of life.
(Anonymous.)

I'm writing this to see how other people might deal with these problems;
1. To do a course I really want to do at college, I need the confidence to go and enrol.
This is made more difficult for me because I started a full time course, but had to finish
part way through because of illness. Also later on I enrolled to do an evening course,
but again I had to finish about half way through, but this time, because it was a difficult
course and I have trouble concentrating.
2. I am lacking the confidence to play my music in front of people, and in a couple of weeks there is a concert which I would really like to do, but feel unable to.
3. Because I don't like eating in the company of other people, I'm unable to go for a meal
with some friends.
When I think about doing these things I tie myself up in knots, and all the negative thoughts
take over any positive aspects. Also this makes it so that I've got more chance of having an epileptic fit.
Any suggestions how to deal with these problems would be more than welcome.